Friday, January 8, 2010

Unexplained vs. Diagnosed Infertility

I have been thinking about this for a while.

What are your reasons for not being able to conceive a baby?  Have you been diagnosed with PCOS?  Endo?  Male factor?  Blocked tubes?  Do you have ovulatory issues?

What have you gone through to fix it?  Meds? Surgery?  At least there is something that can be done to try to fix whatever the issue is, right?

I happen to be one of those "lucky" ones that have been fallen into the "unexplained infertility" category.  What does that really mean?  I've done all the blood tests, HSG, SHG, a laparoscopy and a few hysteroscopies.   Sure, I have had a few polyps removed.  Everything checked out fine since then.  I hear "there is no reason why you can't get pregnant".  Still, I've had 4 failed IUIs.  And still no baby.

Of course I've heard the occasional "you're still healthy and young, you've got time".  Really?  I am 36 now, you really think I have that much time?  Maybe 36 is "still young" for IVF, but I had hope that I would not have to get to this point.

It's just so frustrating that it seems that no one can explain why I can't get pregnant.  AT ALL!  All these years of trying I have NEVER had a BFP.  Not once.  EVER.

Never had a miscarriage, which I am grateful for because I don't know how I could handle it.  I know some of you ladies have gone through this painful experience, and I can't even imagine how strong you are.

It really saddens me to think that I cannot even get pregnant.  What is wrong with my body?  God created our bodies so that we can have babies and have families.  And no one can explain to me why.  Only God knows.

So ladies, I'd appreciate if you would share what your cause of IF is, and if fixing the issue has helped you conceive.  Or if you are "lucky" like me and fall into the "unexplained" group.

7 comments:

  1. I was diagnosed with PCOS and my husband has a moderately low sperm count but still enough to try for IUI's. Our diagnosis didn't help one bit. We're still having to go through IVF so we might as well have blocked tubes or something like that! I hope that one day doctors will have enough information about infertility so that they never have to tell someone they are "unexplained"

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  2. Hello!

    My name is Elisabeth, and I am an infertility / repeated pregnancy loss "veteran". You can read a little bit about me and my experiences in my blog: drhousewife.blogspot.com . I am completing a PhD in Counseling Psychology, and my dissertation is focused upon the impact of infertility on marriage. I believe strongly that there is a need for better support services for men and women who are undergoing IF diagnosis and treatment, and my hope is that this study will aid in the development of such services.

    I am contacting you after stumbling across your blog. I am recruiting participants for my study, and wanted to invite you and your husband to take part. All that would be involved would be the completion of an online survey, that would take approximately 20 minutes. All couples who complete the surveys will receive a voucher good for a pair of free movie tickets at a Regal Cinemas.

    Please let me know if you are interested by emailing me at UTInfertilityResearch@gmail.com .

    Best,
    Elisabeth

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  3. I too, may soon be faced with many tests to determine my fertility. I suffered a miscarriage at 36 and have recently turned 37. We're giving things until Feb and if no + then we go to the Fertility Guys. It's a daunting thing to enter into and I have such compassion for those with and witout explanations.

    Best of luck to you and know that its easy to feel as you are aging out, but we still have time. Our efforts may have to be more agressive, but I have FAITH in that we will both see our dream to fruition.

    Hugs
    Andrea
    persuitofourfairytale.blogspot.com

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  4. Our situation is weird. We keep getting a test result that suggests there could be a diagnosis, but then the follow up says it is not a problem. So we thought we had a male factor. But then the second test was fine. We thought I had PCOS, but all the tests came back normal. My doctor keeps saying all the same things about "there is still every reason to believe it will happen" and "I'm still young."

    There is always a tendency to think the grass is greener and it would be better if there was a firmer diagnosis. But then I wonder if that would take out all the hope.

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  5. Over the past decade I've discovered that I had a uterine septum, MTHFR, and just recently (in the past 2 years), mild endo. It is rather frustrating to think we're onto something and then make the necessary corrections - whether with medication or surgery - only to find ourselves still childless 9 years later. We have had 6 pregnancies end in miscarriage, and that combined experience has been the toughest of my life.

    Sometimes people really want a REASON why we have these problems and I have no idea what to tell them. I can totally see how not having a diagnosis could be incredibly frustrating, and I'm very sorry that you are experiencing that. For me it has been a little different, although finding out what may be causing our problems hasn't gotten us very far to date. I still don't feel like we have "answers." We are still pretty much at square one.

    Wishing you the best.

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  6. Thanks ladies, for all your input. It's good to know that I'm not the only one frustrated about all this. I guess whether or not there is a diagnosis, it is still highly frustrating and truly unfair that we have to deal with so much crap to have a baby.

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  7. i seriously could have written this post. we're unexplained. we've had 4 IUIs. we're frustrated and we're ready. maybe we'll find out something through this IVF process, right? i mean, they'll be inspecting the eggs and watching (or helping along, if needed) the fertilization process. if there's an issue, i'm hoping they'll find it. actually, i just hope they get me knocked up. bring it on, RE!

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