Beta Results!!

WE'RE PREGNANT!

I can hardly believe it myself!  When Katie the NEDC nurse told me that I am pregnant, I actually yelled "Yes!!" on the phone.  It was kind of embarrassing.

My beta came in at 159 at 9dp5dt.  Katie said they usually like to see the numbers come in between 75 - 100.  If it was more than 100 that would be pretty good.  But mine was 159!  I asked what that means, singleton or twins?  She said she is usually pretty good about predicting the number of babies based on the number, but she said those in the 150's always throw her off.  I guess we will have to wait until Monday for my next beta to see what my numbers are.  The numbers have to double every 48 hours, and since my appointment is 4 days away, they want to see my number quadruple.  That would mean my pregnancy is healthy and viable, and they would be able to tell better if there is one or two little ones in there.  For now, 159 is a great number!

As soon as I got off the phone with Katie, I realized I HAD to take a home pregnancy test.  I needed proof that I am pregnant!  Before this, I have never been pregnant before.  This is the first time I have EVER had a positive HPT in almost 10 years of trying!

I was so happy!  And relieved!  I still can't believe it is true.  I started sobbing.  And laughing.  And thanking God for this miracle that he is letting me experience.

Proof that we have a little one (or two) brewing in there!

I have to admit, feeling that I had so much at stake, yesterday I emailed Angie the coordinator to find out if NEDC had received any new donor families that meet our needs since May when we were given our profiles.  I received an email this afternoon from her saying she was confused as to why I was asking about profiles since I don't know my beta results yet.

Then, when Katie called this afternoon, the first thing she asked was why I had inquired with Angie about new donor families.... was I looking for backups if this transfer or if I was looking for future siblings for those embryos we already adopted?  I sheepishly answered, well.... both.  I didn't want to admit to her that I was worried this transfer was not going to work.  Then she said let's put it this way, the only reason why you'd need to look at new donor families is if you are looking for siblings.  You're pregnant!  Oh man.... I can't even express how relieved/happy/excited I was!  This is when I yelled "Yes!!" into the phone.  Like I said, a little embarrassing.  Katie.... she's such a riot.  And I love her!

So this is the wonderful news we have so far.  If you are like me, and have gone through the infertility journey and/or loss, you know that with every good news, we have to be cautious and have to guard our hearts and emotions, until the next milestone.

For now, Babe and I are beyond the moon about this good news!  Please pray for us for good numbers again at our next beta on Monday.  I am so grateful for all of you who have been praying and rooting for us this entire time.

**For those of you who know me in real life or on FB, please do not mention any of this.  We have only shared this news with a few family members and close friends.  Thanks**

Infertility Thanksgiving, of sorts.....

The holiday season can be so hard for so many of us going through the very tough and unwelcome journey of infertility.  So, as we celebrate Thanksgiving tomorrow, I started to think about what is it that I am thankful for?  May people say things like they are thankful for friends and family.  But every year, I struggle with this!  I want to say I am thankful for family too, but I wish I had a family of my own to be thankful for!!

So, even though I am going through this IF journey, I am thankful:

1. For the support of the FEW friends and family members that know about our IF journey.  This is a painful and lonely journey to be on, and support can mean a world of difference!
2. My faith, knowing that no matter what happens God has a plan for me, even though I may not always know what it is.
3. For people who are, and have been PRAYING for DH and I for our journey to parenthood, no matter what it may be.
4. That we live in an age where medical advances have given us hope to have babies when conceiving is difficult or "impossible" for some of us.
5. That DH and I are on the same page on how to proceed with our treatments.  It was not easy starting treatment at first, but now after 4 failed IUIs, we are looking forward to IVF next  year!
6. That DH still has a decent job in this economy (I am currently not working)
7. That DH and I are able to pay for past treatments (some covered by insurance), and that we will be able to finance our future treatments somehow.

I am praying that next year I can be thankful for a healthy *baby or pregnancy*!!

Have a safe and Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!