Embryos Update

Got the call from the embryology lab today.

Unfortunately, no miracle for me.

It looks like Little Embie and Tiny are arresting.  Today, Little Embie has only grown from 3 cells to 4.  Tiny on the other hand has not grown, and has stayed at 2 cells.  They are in a stage where they should have been 3 days ago.

The lab will continue to monitor the embies one final day, but not beyond that.  I'm almost certain there won't be a transfer for us.  They will call again tomorrow morning with a final report and next steps.

Obviously, I am terribly disappointed with where we are right now.  I was feeling OK about it this morning until I told my Babe the news over the phone.  Then I broke down crying.

However, I am feeling a peace about this.  It doesn't mean that I'm not sad or disappointed about this.  I'm sure I'll be envious of other IVFers that make it to transfers, BFPS or birth announcements.  These are emotions I just can't help feeling, but I know that things will turn out OK.  I continue to hang on to the promise that God has plans for my Babe and I, plans to prosper us, and not to harm us.  Plans to give us hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).

I have to remember that faith and feelings are not the same thing.

Thank you all for the amazing outpouring of prayers and well wishes.  You guys are amazing.  I have never received such a huge response my posts as the last couple of days'.  I will continue to post, so I hope you will continue to walk this journey with me.  We'll see where this takes us.

Fertilization Update 3/22

First of all, I want to thank everyone that has left me all those wonderful comments from yesterday's post.  I am humbled that so many of you have prayed or have offered to keep praying for me through these few days.  This has been the hardest few days for me, even worse than the dreaded 2 week wait.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I called the clinic today and talked to a nurse.  It sounds like the doctors normally do a day-3 or day-5 transfer only.  Plus I realized last night that today would already be day-3.  I asked the nurse if the doctor would do day 4 transfers, and the answer is no.   They try leave the embryos alone as much as possible to give the embryos a chance to grow as much as possible without disturbance.  The nurse said she would talk to the doctor or the lab and see what she can find out.

Well Teresa, the nurse from the embryology lab just called me back.  I have bad news and possibly good news.

The bad news:  It looks like Little Embie have not grown since yesterday.  It was at a 3 blast stage yesterday, and it is still at 3 today.  I am saddened by this, but they will continue to monitor closely.

The (possibly) good news:  It looks like an egg that did not fertilize yesterday seems to have fertilized today.  It now has 2 cells.  It is a day late and is slower in growth.  I am naming him/her Tiny.  This give me new hope!

Teresa was telling me that this is really weird, that an egg would fertilized this late.  It is not something they see every day.  I'd like to think of it as a miracle!  They will continue to monitor the embryos closely.  Teresa even gave me the number to the direct line of the embryology lab so I can call tomorrow if I wanted to.

I am feeling a mixture of emotions right now.  Disappointed that Little Embie possibly did not make it, and hope that Tiny may now be in the picture.

So now we wait some more.  The clinic will call me tomorrow with more information, about what time the transfer will be on Wednesday, or if the transfer will be cancelled.  Obviously, I'm hoping that both Little Embie and Tiny makes it tomorrow, and we would be able to continue with a transfer on Wednesday.

Please continue to pray that both Little Embie and Tiny will continue to multiply and grow strong and healthy.

I so want these embies back inside me!